Archive for November, 2010

The Best Thing Ever

Monday, November 29th, 2010

Warning: Sappy post ahead.

After having a baby, I found it’s quite common to joke about things like how you never get any sleep, how time you used to spend going out to movies or restaurants with your significant other is now replaced by changing diapers and picking up after toys. Then there’s the opposite, where you say how excited you are at your child’s first words, or his first steps.

What is less easy to express though, is the incredible, indefinable feeling of having a child you love, and who loves you back. There’s only one other example I can think of to relate it to, which was my freshman year from college when I was walking alone back to my dorm after lunch and suddenly realized that I was desperately in love with my future wife. Loving your child, and having him love you back, is like having that feeling every time he smiles at you, or gives you a hug, or lies down on his blanket and tells you “night night.”

I think part of why I’ve been thinking about this lately is that Maddox has just reached the stage where he really has been reciprocating our feelings towards him. Basically, he loves hugging! And even though he’s done it hundreds of times by now, the feeling of picking up your child and having him rest his head on your shoulder, not because he’s sleepy (though that’s nice too) but because he loves you, is like nothing I’ve ever felt before.

On Saturday I watched Mads for a large part of the day while Leanne was in Boston. We built a racetrack together using his blocks, and raced his trucks along it. I surprised him with it after lunch, and seeing his expression when he walked into his room and saw it was so cool. After playing on the floor for 30 minutes with this I started to get a bit tired and rest my head, but he wouldn’t have any of that. Any time I stopped moving my truck or put my head down I’d get a loud “DADA!” and perhaps some encouragement in the form of him bashing his truck into mine.

Anyway, usually when we put him to bed he’s pretty preoccupied with whatever book we give him to read. But that night he laid down on his back and looked right up at me with an expression that said, I had a really fun day with you today dad.